HALF A YEAR ... ADD 3 YEARS LATER

I'm feeling like Mugiwara crew's "2 years"..

adding more fat than ever.

but along the way i learn a better way to taking care of the body

I haven't got to 70kg, but I'll get it there

And this is my first post as a wife, as a mom which i felt a pure bliss.

We got our first house too.

but it's not easy as it look.

IT NEVER WAS

NEVER WILL

BUT

It will worth it

because there's a new focus

new reason to strive more than ever

Exhausted already blending well with me.

yerp.

 

A memo for a friend

We both have a strong will, 
We know what come first,
So we take our own road.. 
I do not bore an ill wish to you,
Only a pray for that someone will catch you
For better or for worst.. 

Aminnnn...  😊

Sabah tanah airku

5thJune 2015, 7:15am.....  It wont be the last

its almost ....

how time flies...
(and still chubbs chubbs)
ok.. continue working, fellas..

p/s: manglish is so mainstream.. hoho

kepuasan disakiti

jangan bermain dengan cinta jika tidak sanggup menanggung rasa sakitnya

its been awhile... while while...

Yoh!

I totally forgot about thy own existence, O' blog of my .. so waddap?

Its being almost 2 years since I update my nonsensical here. Life getting rough, but here I am , still holding on.. and kicking some a**.. hahahaha!!

I wouldn't say that around those of my absent time is the best nor the worst, but its really does worthwhile. Some people hit my head really hard to make me realize all the reckless things I did.

I'm not impress with all the wrongdoings, but I never wanted to rewind all those things that made me who I am today. I'm blessed that I've being given a chance to change, for better or worst.

Did I change? yap, I become cubbylicous.. and its not good, and before entering Fasting month last year, I stop all physical training ( reason: I'm tired and like to feel what its like to not to exercise and eat all the junk food)..which later on become a health problem. Other reason? ...

My granny (from my mom side) passaway just before Ramadan, just like my Arwah Atuk passaway a day before Syawal in '94. 

That time I was in Labuan for company annual sport event, and my mom keep calling me. So I'm taking the first ferry to leave early. And late that night, I'm with my Nenek. I think that time, on that night was the last time I've seen her making jokes, got her craving for "air kelapa", and other things I can only kept it to myself. 

I could never forget the way nenek looking at me when I arrive at hospital. Its like she's being waiting for me for a long time, smiling.. maybe Allah giving me a chance to be with nenek until her last breath, to feel the essence of life, slowly leaving her body that second night. It was before fajr approach, I have to call my aunt, and bongsu bearing the news and I still can keep my voice firm. But I breakdown when I calling my dad, the only person to hear my weeping voice. 

Up until now, I still think she still somewhere here, still telling her story to her grand kids. My tiny cousins, still adjusting with her absence though. 

As for all the days come by, just be prepare for the worst. but Death isn't the worst thing.. 

how do we running our lives, determine how will we die.. and that's scary...

till then.. 

I bid you adéu

There's two heart that once beated as one
When hearty ask heartless to lock her with him heartless says " will see, but its difficult on both of us"

So hearty patiently waiting for heartless, even though chances are slim.
Time passing by, and there still no word from heartless. hearty think its time to move on.
When heartless find out about hearty plan, he come out confessed to hearty and said " actually, i can't live without you. i wanted to be with you but because of our circumstantial there's a lot to be done."
Hearty said " even if we can be together, one of us will have to lose..both of us don't want to change for better or worst... There's a price to pay"

Even though heartless try to tied a knot with hearty, he can't because what he is... and so with unsettled feeling, he let hearty go free. hearty wanted to be with heartless but he couldn't keep up with his words.

And so hearty left, leaving heartless broken to pieces alone..

junkies for treasure .. LOL

Tomorrow, it's Fasting month!

Today, it's such a slow day....

Yesterday, I shop like I never shop before.... I have feminine carving to fill in sometimes... I rarely spent THAT much amount.. I don't mind if its food or grocery, by the way..

These, bazaar I went yesterday looks like flee market to me.. Its a bargain, bargain, bargain! But cloth wasn't the only thing I bought; a simple book would make these old gal happy.. It's the only thing that I bought without hesitation.

I almost forgot how I enjoy reading books and have it around me. I read online books too, much greener, and faster?; but nothing beats the old way of how people read books.

Technology always upgrading their standard, so on and on... but books would always be printed and deliver just like they did it a century ago... Cheers to books ^^

The 3 Musketeer

This "thing" has being running over and over in my head.. So I might just let it out here, what else can I do? (anyway, the title just for symbolic use)

It's not big deal actually, when you see three best closest buddies hangout together. It just my curiosity, why THREE? or sometime it comes with ODD digit.

As we always see in daily life, whatever the occasion there always be a group of three.



well~ almost three... for me, it doesn't matter three or five.. As long as they don't back stab you!!! and that's all that matters to me ^^

Killing your way to the top~

As I recall one of my days
Spending hours after hours in the library
I stumble across a book, the title read "The Famous Last Words"
( Nowadays, you can find these quote on the Web )

As I read, one quote stuck into my thick skull for the rest of my life:

Kill a man, and you are a murderer.
Kill millions of men, and you are a conquerer.
Kill everyone, and you are a god.
Jean Rostand


I don't know how to describe to you but I love the idea of killing your way to the top, but its rather exaggerating.
So try to look it on the bright side.... instead of killing, try think the other way around..

Just don't defy God.. ^_^



although, there's no connection between my fav quote with this picture of Aragon...

"One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them,
One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them"

Now I'm totally out of topic.. Long Live LOTR!!

foolish

I couldn't shake this feeling off from me. When mouth is faster than your brain, it's easy to see whose the biggest fool. It doesn't matter if you try joking around or in the middle of discussion, choose your words wisely.

I recall some conversation I made last night and it sucks, and it wasn't even a JOKE!
I just wish I could reverse that time and say something normal, but the damage is done.
And there some other event, my selfishness bloom like a spore that spreading through the entire jungle.

I keep pulling a long face and try to avoid conversation. But I should know better, none of us want it that way.. Just didn't go exactly like we plan and it really frustrating.

I'm sorry again and again, that I had failed to overcome this feeling.

I wish I could be better person for you

Region Out of Focus

When did the last time I log in to this blog? I could only assumed it's being almost a year now since I post anything here.

I have to admit, there times I lost interest with this bloggering stuff. But then I realize, by writing alone can make me stay in touch to reality. When there's something that bother me the most, I try to calm myself convince it will be alright. If self-assured wasn't promising enough, I turn to someone whom I could count on, hearing me out, telling me everything is a-okay.

When it comes to something gibberish, my only hope is "this" page. I try not to sound like lunatic although I already Am sound like one, especially when I start talking to myself bout everything.

Normally, people start talking to themselves while at work.. just some people do that including me. Basically, at work when talking to one-self its normal (as long as the content is related to work). But, if you do that in public people will assume you have some mental disease.

I don't really care what people think bout me talking to myself, cause it's my way to get some answers. I'm not the only one..

At least I'm not demented. Continue carry on with your life now.

Such a cloudy mind

I don't have a right word to say or wisdom that anyone can seek, but why anyone wanna seek me out anyway? ^^
My mind very stuffy now, but it wasn't because my working condition. It's all about my bedroom..

I'm really such a homey person, I rather stay at home doing something that maybe some people think it's boring that going out, but I do went out occasionally.




So when one room in such a jeopardy, one head get dizzy, and same goes with those dusty rabbits. It's cleaning time! I don't know why I enjoy cleaning, not just my room but the whole household (though sometimes I can be very cranky when some individual just don't know how to tidy up their own garbage).

But now, better stop babbling and start taking action.